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Every day there is only
One thing to learn:
How to be honestly happy.

Sri Chinmoy

4 Ways To Conquer Jealousy

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A colleague makes promotion at work, while you remain unnoticed. A friend buys a beautiful house, while in your tiny apartment you are still struggling to make ends meet. Your brother has natural charisma and stunning good qualities, whereas you’re just…okay.

Feeling helpless and weak, you inflate the other person to supernatural proportions. ‘Why them? Why not me?’ you ask despondently. Slowly but surely that sibling, friend or colleague becomes your worst enemy, constantly, if not purposely, flaunting his or her superiority. Before you even noticed, the green-eyed monster of jealousy has sunk its venomous teeth into your neck.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

We all have wrestled the green-eyed monster at some point(s) in our life. Every time we marvel at its superhuman strength. Entire empires and civilisations have been destroyed by it.

Despite our sincere efforts to try and live a conscious and loving life jealousy immediately brings out the worst in us. You catch yourself hoping your successful colleague will be fired, or your friend’s new house will be robbed. You know you should be happy for them, but you feel exactly the opposite…

My own spiritual teacher Sri Chinmoy suffered much from jealousy. Whenever he smiled at one of his students, he ran the risk of the person sitting next to that student becoming jealous. He often said that without jealousy the world would make much faster progress.

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Jealousy comes from our ego, which like to feel superior. It constantly sees mistakes and imperfections in others, while judging itself flawless and perfect. So when others’ talent or success is showing, the ego becomes nervous. Its unique position is being threatened! Jealousy rears its ugly head and we try to bring the other person down, so that our ego can at least feel equal, or, preferably, a little superior.

However, this is only an illusion. In reality we are all one. We all come from the same divine source. Sri Chinmoy compared this feeling of oneness with the fingers on a hand. “Look at your little finger and look at your thumb,” he said. “Your little finger is much weaker than your thumb, but they have established their oneness. The little finger does not feel miserable because it is weaker than the thumb. No, the little finger feels that they go together.” He added, “Jealousy can be overcome only by our constant feeling of oneness with others. If we can see and feel them inside ourselves as members of our own larger family, jealousy will disappear from our life.”

To feel oneness with others is easier said than done. It can take years of serious meditation. Sometimes we  experience a glimpse of it. Such as when we’re watching a sports game. When your team scores a point, you cheer and feel happy. When they win the match, your joy can be so profound that you almost feel it is you who has won. At that time you’re not jealous of the athletes’ great capacities. On the contrary, they make you proud! In that sincere feeling of oneness, jealousy is nowhere to be found.

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To be happy in others’ happiness is the perfect antidote to jealousy. Buddhists have even developed a special meditation technique for this, which is called mudita or sympathetic joy. Mudita is the twin sister of empathy, only now you’re sharing the other person’s joy and happiness, instead of his or her pain and sorrow. “Another person’s success and happiness is a very good thing,” spiritual coach Steve Pavlina writes on his blog. “When the people around me are happy and fulfilled, they’ll naturally spread those feelings to others.  This is a situation to be desired, not avoided.”

When jealousy has lost its painful sting, you can even discover some good in it! Jealousy arises when someone achieves something that you yourself desired or aspired for. But instead of wallowing in self-pity you can use your envy as an incentive, a motivating force to fulfil your dreams. As spiritual author Alan Cohen writes in his book Handle with Prayer, “The fact that a particular person and his or her experience is in your field of awareness means that you are capable of creating the same for yourself, and you are probably close to it. Instead of cursing another as a detractor from your good, bless this person as a harbinger of your own miracles.”

Change jealousy to gratitude and the green-eyed monster becomes a cuddly teddybear!

What else can you do against an attack of jealousy? Below are four ways to rid yourself of jealousy’s bite. Whether you take the practical or the spiritual approach is up to you, but the next time the green-eyed monster shows its teeth you’ll be armed and ready!

1. Be happy in others’ happiness
Mudita or ‘sympathetic joy’ is one of the four brahma-viharas or ‘sublime states’ in buddhism. Often mudita is compared to the joy a mother feels about the progress of her child. But whereas it isn’t that hard for a mother to feel joy about the successes of her offspring, mudita requires quite a bit of practice in most other cases.

Sit up straight on a chair or a meditation cushion and breathe calmly and relaxed. After a minute or so picture someone in your mind who comes across as genuinely happy and who seems to be doing well. Pick someone who instantly puts a smile on your face. Then think of all the things that are working out great for him or her and silently repeat to yourself the phrase ‘May your happiness and prosperity continue, may they increase and never wane.’ Try to really mean it! Then, after another minute, think of someone about whom you have a neutral feeling, like the mailman, the bus driver or the person at the register of your local drugstore. Again repeat the phrase. Then do it for someone you actually dislike or are jealous of. Finally try to do it for the entire humanity. By practicing sympathetic joy your heart will expand, and jealousy will slowly but surely stop bothering you.

2. Meditate on oneness
Whenever there is a feeling of oneness jealousy cannot exist. According to Sri Chinmoy the best way to develop oneness is to meditate on the heart. “The heart creates oneness, and oneness is another name for spontaneous joy,” he wrote. He didn’t mean the physical heart, but the spiritual heart, also called the anahata chakra. The spiritual heart is located in the middle of your chest, right at the spot where you point to when you say ‘Me’.

Sit up straight and breathe calmly and quietly. Now every time you breathe in, feel you’re not breathing in through your nose and mouth, but through your spiritual heart and feel you are holding the breath there. Do this for about five minutes. Then out loud repeat three times, ‘I am one with all beings’. If you can do this on a daily basis, you will start living in your heart more. Simultaneously, your feeling of oneness and connectedness will grow.

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3. Speak your mind
Sometimes jealousy can vanish just by mentioning it, especially to the person you’re jealous of. It needs a bit of courage, but it can work miracles. I can tell from experience. When I was in acting school, we had a boy in our class who was a natural acting talent. He had already played the main part in a big theatre production and one magazine mentioned him a as the next big thing in acting. In no time I was paralysed with jealousy. Because I actually liked the guy I felt doubly guilty. My mom gave me some golden advice: just express your feelings openly. During a dinner with our class the subject came up, and I openly confessed my jealousy. What a relief! Because of my sincere confession both my feeling of guilt and my jealousy vanished like clouds before the sun.

4. You can do much better (you just don´t feel like showing it)
If you can’t shake off the feeling of jealousy even after trying all of the above, Sri Chinmoy advises an unorthodox method. Just convince yourself of the fact that you whatever you’re jealous of in the other person, you yourself could do much better if you wanted to. It’s just that you don’t need to show it. You know you could easily land a book contract like your successful writer-friend, but as it happens you don’t really want or need to. And if you really put your mind to it, you could easily starts a successful business just like your sister did. It’s just that you’ve made other choices right now.

Trick your mind! Force yourself to believe in that self-created reality. It may sound like an absurd thought-experiment, but if you succeed it is very effective. It may not cure you permanently, but at least it momentarily releases jealousy’s painful sting.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

My journey from atheism to faith

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I started my life a devout atheist.

In my teens I was convinced that God was a fairytale, and I looked down on people who believed. Didn’t they see the overwhelming odds against them? One look at the world and all its suffering should be proof enough that there is no benign, all-loving Entity calling the shots. God was just a man-made invention to alleviate his fear of death and the unknown, so said my teenage theological doctrine.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

I remember a geography lesson in high-school where I led a heated discussion with a boy in my class who was a God-believer. Although I unleashed one logical argument on him after the other, still the kid wouldn’t listen to reason. If someone would have told my cocksure thirteen-year-old self that a mere five years later I would also believe in God, I would have told them they were crazy.

But I discovered that atheism can be fruitful soil for the spiritual life. It’s like a clean slate, untainted by institutional religion or strict religious upbringing, which God can imprint with His own signature.

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How did this miraculous change happen? It was during the year I was an exchange student in Canada. My host parents were religious, and out of curiosity I started reading some scripture. I read that if you wanted to know if God really existed, you could actually ask him with a sincere prayer.

I decided to pop the question.

I went down on my knees, folded my hands and… asked. But before I had even formulated the question, my heart started beating so loud I thought my chest was going to explode. The answer came even before I asked!

To add ‘insult to injury’, this was exactly what the scriptures had said. “And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will answer,” was the quote from the Bible I had read.

I later discovered I was in good company. Some great spiritual figures started their lives as atheists. Swami Vivekananda, the famous disciple of Sri Ramakrishna and the first Indian spiritual master to come to the West in 1893, used to be a fierce unbeliever in his youth who often mocked his Guru for his faith in God.

The Indian spiritual master Sri Aurobindo had his formal education in England where he studied at Cambridge and immersed himself in Western culture. He wrote, “They proved to me by convincing reasons that God did not exist, and I believed them. Afterwards I saw God, for He came and embraced me. And now which am I to believe, the reasonings of others or my own experience?”

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When people in 18th century Europe first heard stories about the Australian platypus, most couldn’t believe such an outrageous animal existed. Yet it did. God is like the platypus: really exotic and a little incredible at first, but true nonetheless.

The funny thing is that once you really start believing, that’s it; There is no turning back. Here I’m not talking about the agnostic’s belief, which is quite vague and non-descript, but real spiritual faith which results from inner experience.

Once you’ve had a real spiritual experience, you go beyond the reasoning mind to a realm where truth is self-evident. You discover that God can never be separated from your own existence.
We are one.

“Faith always brings deeper faith to the fore.”
-Sri Chinmoy

(Seventy-Seven Thousand Service-Trees, part 17, poem #16,293)

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

Self-transcendence: the royal road to happiness

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What I remember most about my first marathon is that the distance was about 10K too long. Like 99% of all marathon runners I was exhausted after 32K and realized I had ten more to go.

They were to become the most agonizing kilometres of my life. The more the finish line neared, the more agonizing they became. My body screamed and begged for mercy, but I just continued putting one foot in front of the other.

And suddenly there it was, glistening in the distance like the shore of a new land – the finish line! Once I crossed it a miracle occurred. The pain suddenly vanished and a powerful feeling of joy and happiness flooded my entire being.

That first marathon taught me an extremely valuable lesson about happiness. I discovered that happiness is the reward for challenging and transcending your personal limitations.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

When you transcend yourself in any field, happiness is bound to be there. First-time marathoners know what I’m talking about, but so does anyone who has ever sincerely tried to go beyond what their minds conceived of as impossible.

Perhaps the greatest example of this is Ashrita Furman, an American 58-year-old who is known the world over for holding the most Guinness Book records in the world. He has broken over 500 Guinness records during his life, with over 200 still standing.

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Ashrita breaking the record of standing on a ball for the longest time.

Some records are really hard, like holding a brick in one hand while walking 85 miles, others are funny like running a mile with a milk bottle on his head, pushing an orange with his nose or slicing as many apples as possible in one minute with a Samurai sword.

Why does he do it?

His answer is both simple and enlightening: because it makes him happy. “It’s enormously satisfying to transcend my capacities,”he told me a few years ago. “Every day we’re trapped inside a limited space, and breaking a record is like stepping outside that box.”

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Catching the most eggs in one minute.

Ashrita is a student of Sri Chinmoy, whose spiritual philosophy emphasizes on challenging our capacities and going beyond ourselves. Sri Chinmoy calls this “self-transcendence”.

According to Sri Chinmoy the concept of self-transcendence carries tremendous spiritual significance. It is our inner urge to perfect our nature and become the best possible version of ourselves we can ever be.

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You don’t have to break records or run marathons to experience the joy of self-transcendence. It can be done in everyday life. All you need is a genuine inner urge to improve yourself in whatever field it is you’re involved in.

If you’re learning to play the piano you will get joy by improving your standard. If you just started running, your self-transcendence will be to run a little longer every day and to become fitter and healthier.

For Ashrita even taking out the garbage was an opportunity for self-transcendence. He timed himself and every time he tried to improve his timing. This is how menial tasks can become challenging and fun.

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Ashrita Furman (the guy on the left)

Try to challenge yourself today. See every activity as an opportunity to bring forward your capacities and good qualities, and practise the art of self-transcendence. Happiness is bound to follow you.

Transcendence is perfection.
Perfection is transcendence.
When we transcend our capacities,
Immediately we get an inner joy,
An inner thrill,
Which is another name for perfection.
No perfection can ever be achieved
Without self-transcendence.

-Sri Chinmoy

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

The world’s most underestimated quality

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Ask any person which quality they would like to have best in their lives and you’ll probably get a host of answers like love, joy, compassion, courage or determination. Likely though, patience will not be one of them. Patience is like the black sheep in the family of divine qualities. It is arguably the most undervalued and underestimated virtue of all. But if we truly knew the value and meaning of patience, we would rate it a lot higher. And perhaps even put it at the very top of our list. Here are three common misconceptions about patience.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

Misconception#1: Patience is weakness
Truth: Patience is the road to success

We often associate patience with a state of helplessness or weakness. When people are not acting in the way we expect them to, we are told to be patient with them. Or if our desires are not fulfilled, we are forced into patience. We feel patience is something that is thrust upon us, making us a weak and helpless victim of time.

But go and ask highly successful people about the meaning of patience in their lives and you’ll probably get a whole different answer. They’ll tell you patience is the key. Success is not like instant coffee. It is often the work of a lifetime (or lifetimes, if you – like me – believe in reincarnation), the result of constant self-giving effort.

Patience
Means
Success ultimate

-Sri Chinmoy

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Misconception: Patience is stagnant pool
Truth: patience is a flowing river

In the beginning of my spiritual life I suffered from the rookie’s disease to crave for instant enlightenment. I simply couldn’t wait to have all those wonderful qualities I read about in spiritual literature: peace, bliss, unbounded love, inner strength – and I wanted them now! Tough luck for me. It turned out it wasn’t going to be the walk in the park I was hoping for.

To our minds patience equals waiting, the most boring activity on earth. When we are fired with eagerness to have something, but then learn that we can’t have it right now, but only at some future time – in other words, that we have to be patient – we sink into a deep pit of frustration. No wonder we loathe patience!

Then I learned that in the spiritual life every day – even every hour, minute and second – can be a divinely inspired opportunity to grow and make progress. The journey itself becomes the destination. I learned that patience is not static but dynamic, like a flowing river taking me slowly and steadily towards the goal.

A farmer sows a seed in spring, but he doesn’t run out to see the result the very next week. He knows he will have to wait until harvest time comes around in the fall. In the meantime he’s not sitting still; he works his fields every day to keep the ground fertile. For the farmer patience is definitely not static, but utterly dynamic.

So instead of thinking of patience as lost waiting time, think of it as an opportunity to work on the things that need your immediate attention. Don’t even call it patience! Call it being in the moment and following the flow. Then patience actually becomes the boat in which you sail on the ever-flowing river of time. It not only loses its foul taste, but actually becomes something highly enjoyable.

Surprisingly beautiful
Is the hour of patience.
Amazingly fruitful
Is the power of patience.

-Sri Chinmoy

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Misconception: patience is an excuse not to try our best
Truth: patience conquers our negative qualities

When striving for a big goal, like writing a book, organizing a big event or – the goal of goals – spiritual enlightenment, we sometimes cleverly use patience as an excuse not to do our very best. We feel that since the goal is so high, so lofty, we can relax and enjoy ourselves in the name of patience, in the hope that the goal will one day knock at our door. Unfortunately – or perhaps fortunately – it doesn’t work like that.

Here we are confusing patience with lack of eagerness and intensity, which are needed to achieve our goals. Patience will never say that we don’t have to work hard. We’ll work hard, but at the same time we must know that there is something called God’s choice Hour, the divinely chosen time for us to reach the goal. So patience goes hand in hand with surrender – the conscious acceptance of the divine Will and the divine Time.

If we use patience in the right way it can conquer our negative qualities. When we are attacked by fear, doubt, insecurity or any other negative quality, we can exercise the strength of our patience to ward off the attack. When a doubting thought comes, just reject it and tell yourself “No, I am all faith, all belief.” When fear comes, reject the fear-impulse and say to yourself, “I am one with the entire universe; I am vastness itself; I am the soul.”
By patiently refusing negative qualities from entering into us, a time will come when they will no longer bother us. Negative qualities don’t have any patience at all. They will feel that it is a waste of their time to bother us, and eventually they’ll leave us alone.

Patience, increasing patience,
Is all we need
To be victorious
In the battlefield of life.

-Sri Chinmoy

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

How to become an inner hero

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When we think of a hero we usually think of someone who saves another person’s life, fights for a just cause or achieves extraordinary success in his or her field. In the outer life heroism is judged by someone’s actions, and traditionally a hero is someone who has shown exemplary courage or sacrifice. But there is also something called inner heroism. An inner hero is someone who struggles with his or her own imperfections and strives to become the best possible version of him- or herself. This is the path of true nobility and character building. Not everyone can become an outer hero. But all of us can become true inner heroes. Here are seven steps to inner heroism.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

1. Accept the world as it is
We don’t live in an ideal world, far from it. In spite of our best efforts to spread goodness and kindness, the world often frowns at us, ridicules us or just turns the cold shoulder of indifference. The rudeness, harshness and ingratitude of the world sometimes overwhelms us and we feel a sense of hopelessness. What use is our giving if nobody appreciates it? Faced with this discouraging lack of receptivity it’s easy to give up loving and serving the world and humanity.

An inner hero tries to see the bigger picture. The world is not a finished product, it is in the process of evolution. In order to change the world the inner hero knows he will have to accept the world as it is now, with all its imperfections and limitations. If she has to wait for the world to be perfect before she can offer it our service and goodwill, then she’ll have to wait for eternity.

The mother knows her child is not perfect, but still she loves him with all her heart. The mother sees the limitations of her child as her very own. An inner hero uses this unconditional mother’s love when dealing with the world.

Be an inner hero and accept the world as it is now. See its good intentions, forgive its faults and help it wherever and whenever you can.

2. Work hard without demanding appreciation
When we’ve achieved something, we often long for appreciation and admiration. We want others to praise the result of our hard work. When it doesn’t come we feel frustrated and disappointed. If you attach too much importance to the appreciation of others, you miss the subtle meaning and inherent satisfaction of hard work. Hard work is the chisel that shapes true character. It teaches us concentration, perseverance, endurance and skill.

An inner hero works with his heart, fully engaged in the present moment. She doesn’t allow her mind to think of the past or the future. In this way the work itself becomes like a meditation. Work done in this spirit is its own reward, leaving us with an abiding sense of satisfaction. Outer appreciation is like icing on the cake. It’s nice if it comes, but we’re not hankering after it

Our ego is an eternal attention-beggar. But when we embark on the path of inner heroism we realize that we have to outgrow the childish demands of our ego. True greatness lies not in proudly showing the world what we have done, but in quietly and humbly offering our achievement to the world, without asking anything in return.

“Unlike the outer hero, the inner hero is always supremely humble.”
-Sri Chinmoy

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3. Do not give in to negativity
It’s always easier to point out others’ defects and weaknesses than to appreciate their good qualities. Similarly, it’s easier to be lazy than to be active, easier to be negative than constructive, easier to doubt and suspect than to believe and have faith. Yet only by encouraging the positive qualities inside us do we make progress and go forward. And real happiness lies in progress, not in standing still.

There are two voices inside you fighting for attention. One voice is positive, encouraging and inspiring, the other is cynical and negative. Both are talking to you, but it’s up to you to which of the two you lend your ears. Strangely enough we usually listen to the negative voice, even though its messages are making us miserable and unhappy. Because we spend so much time with the negative voice, we don’t hear the inspiring, soothing and uplifting words of the positive voice.

Be wise, be a spiritual hero, and once again start listening to the positive voice. When you make the conscious choice only to listen to the positive messages inside you, you’ll soon discover that the negative voice will stop talking to you.

4. Fight with yourself, not with others
Heroes and battles are inseparable. Also on the path of inner heroism there are bound to be fights. The difference is you’re not fighting with others, but only with your own limitations and imperfections. By engaging in the inner battle you are moulding and sculpting yourself into a more positive, loving, brighter and kinder human being – a real inner hero!

Here fighting doesn’t imply violence or aggression, but the act of conquering or overcoming negativity. Fighting with ourselves means overcoming the hurdles and challenges of our ego, and aligning ourselves with our true nature, our soul. One very effective way to discover the soul is through prayer and meditation. Throughout the centuries thousands of seekers, sages, saints and yogi’s have travelled the path of spiritual discipline and succeeded in finding their inner treasures.

“We take birth for only one purpose: to win in the battlefield of life.”
-Sri Chinmoy

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA5. Become a self-giver
When I was a child I loved my birthday, because it meant getting presents. Nowadays I get much more joy by giving someone else something they really like on their birthdays. Over the years I have realized there is much more joy in giving than in taking. When you give you expand your heart and become one with others. This feeling of oneness is synonymous with joy and happiness.

Here giving doesn’t necessarily mean to give material things. It can also refer to spiritual qualities like kindness, love, compassion and forgiveness. When someone smiles at me on the street I feel that person has given me something really valuable in the form of kindness. If you can forgive someone who has hurt you, you give that person something very precious.

When you can give your love, your joy, your concern to others without asking or expecting anything in return, you will discover a source of spontaneous happiness growing inside your heart. If you want to become an inner hero, then from today start paying attention to giving. Feel that each time you give, you are becoming a better person

6. Never give up!
Contrary to what you may think, successful people often do not possess more talent than the rest. And just like everybody else they also regularly experience failure before their success. What sets them apart however is their determination to succeed. They don’t attach much importance to their failures.

If you don’t take failure as the final result but as an unavoidable stepping stone in your learning process, you are bound to succeed eventually. To an inner hero failure is just that: an opportunity to do better next time. Take your failures as friends in disguise, whose only purpose is to lead you onwards on the path of success and progress.
Each time you fall down, just get up, shake the dust from your clothes, and cheerfully start over again – like a true inner hero.

“Allow failure to teach you a supreme lesson: Each sunset is the beginning of a very, very bright and powerful sunrise.”
Sri Chinmoy

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7. Always go forward
The past can be a prison. When we think about all the things we’ve done wrong over the years we may become discouraged. Just because we lied or were rude to someone last week or ten years ago, we think we can never become good, better or best.

Everybody makes mistakes, including inner heroes. But instead of dwelling on his mistakes, an inner hero uses his mistakes to strengthens his resolve to do better next time. To the inner hero mistakes, like failures, are stepping stones which she uses to mould and shape herself into the person she wants to become.

To deal with past experiences the inner hero has a very effective mantra: the past is dust. Life happens here and now. Whatever took place in the past is not of any use to us now. If it was good, then we can cherish it as a nice memory. If it was bad we should just discard it.

Live your life with your feet in the present and your nose pointing towards the future. Then the past will no longer be able to imprison you and block your growth into the best version of yourself you can possibly be.

“If you make a mistake in spite of your best intentions, remember this mantra: ‘the past is dust.'”
-Sri Chinmoy

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

10 Things Humble People Do Differently

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In the search for enduring happiness, humility is an often overlooked quality. In our fast-paced and ambition-fuelled world we tend to value assertiveness, a go-get attitude and a healthy dose of self-promotion. Successful people fill the covers and pages of magazines and newspapers with their high-profile lives, sending an unspoken message that humility is not going to get you very far. If your goal is a life in the spotlights, that may be true. But if all you long for is a simple, meaningful and happy life, then humility is indispensable.

Humble people don’t stand out, yet they exude an invisible force, a hidden strength that gives them an aura of nobility, peacefulness and grace. To be in the company of a truly humble person is a blessing, because their gentleness and kindness brings to the fore our own good qualities. We can learn much from humble people. Here are 10 things humble people do differently.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!
  1. They don’t think they know everything

Humble people are aware of the fact that there are infinitely more things they do not know, than things they know. That’s why they are always eager to learn. If their own views or opinions change because of something they hear, read, see or discover, they don’t resist or rebel against this new truth, but are happy that they have become wiser because of it. Since their learning, growing and becoming wiser never stop, they have a constant supply of newness and freshness in their life. And that is synonymous with being really happy.

  1. They make others feel special

Humble people don’t draw attention to themselves. Instead, they are more interested in the people around them. They feel that each life is unique and special in some way, and are curious to find out what experiences others have gone through in life. They value and respect each human being, because they know all of us face challenges and difficulties in life.

  1. They don’t forget to love themselves

At the same time, humble people don’t erase their own importance. They have realized that to acquire real, unconditional love, we have to love ourselves first. Humble people can extend love to others, precisely because they love themselves in a healthy, constructive way. This love is not based on the ego, but has its origins in the soul, the divine spark residing deep within us.

If we don’t have something first, we cannot give. Loving ourselves is essential if we truly want to love others. If we don’t love ourselves, our love for others will always have some expectation or demand in it. We expect others to be grateful to us, or to show us love in return. But this is not pure love, not unconditional love. Humble people can make others feel special, because they honour their own uniqueness. They can be selfless, because they already feel loved.

“Humility doesn’t mean taking a back seat. When you take a back seat consciously and deliberately in order to show others how humble you are, you are not being humble at all.”
-Sri Chinmoy, TheJewels of Happiness

 

  1. They live in the heart, rather than the mind

True humility is based on the feeling of oneness. In essence all life is one. But we can feel this truth only when we are in the heart, not in the mind. The very nature of the mind is to divide and separate. The mind feels that my life, my reality is completely separated from yours. In the mind-world we are all little islands that have nothing to do with one another. To the mind everyone is a stranger.

The heart knows no strangers. It goes beyond the apparent physical separation and feels that on a deeper level we are all connected. We are all little drops inside the same ocean of existence. The heart will always focus on what unites us, rather than on what divides us. This is the basis of true humility, because if there is oneness, there can be no feeling of superiority or inferiority.

How can you start living in the heart? For that you have to pray and meditate. Spiritual discipline is the art of diving and digging within in order to discover your inner treasures of love, peace and happiness. If you can meditate on the heart every day, even just for a few minutes, slowly and steadily you will discover the beautiful feeling of oneness and automatically develop a sense of true humility.

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  1. They are happy in the happiness of others

When we see other people being successful or happy, we usually find it difficult to be happy for them. Quite often we are stung by an unpleasant feeling of jealousy. We secretly hope that their success will disappear or that some calamity will take place in their life, and we get a form of malicious joy if it does.

Even though we know we should be happy and not jealous with others’ successes, we find it difficult, if not impossible, to really feel it. This has to do with our ego – that obnoxious, overambitious fellow inside us that always feels it has to compete with the whole world in order to maintain its supremacy.

Humble people have discovered a way to silence the voice of the ego. Because they live more in the heart, they find it easy to identify themselves with others’ success and progress. “If you live in your heart, others’ joy will secretly enter into you and widen your heart,” Sri Chinmoy writes.

Humble people are happy in the happiness of others, because they know that the more happy people there are in the world, the more positive energy will circulate, making our world a more pleasant place to live for everybody. The success of others makes humble people grateful, because that success serves as an example that gives them the encouragement, inspiration and courage to also make the best of their lives.

  1. They like to share what they have

Very often we jealously guard the things we have to offer. Whether it is knowledge, skills, personal qualities, experiences, inspiration or possessions, we feel that if we share them with others, we will lose the privilege of having them for ourselves. We’re afraid we will lose our uniqueness, because we feel that when we share what we have with others they will soon surpass us.

Humble people beg to differ. They know that real joy and happiness lie in giving and sharing, not in keeping everything to ourselves. When you give, you expand your reality and become one with others. In this way you gradually grow into the realisation that the whole world belongs to you and that you belong to the world as well. This feeling adds meaning, purpose and happiness to your life.

A tree that has no fruits, flowers or shade to offer stands tall and erect. But a tree that is laden with fruits and flowers bends down to offer its gifts to whoever passes by.

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  1. They admit their mistakes

When a child learns how to walk he constantly falls down. Yet every time he falls down, he just gets up and tries again. The child doesn’t feel that falling down is a failure. He knows that falling down is just part of the process of learning how to walk.

Likewise, humble people know that making mistakes is a necessary step in our search for growth, perfection and improvement. They’re not afraid to admit their mistakes, because they feel they can learn from them.

If we overlook our mistakes, or blame somebody else for them, we will continue making the same mistakes time and again. But if we have the courage to admit we’ve done or seen something wrong, or made a bad decision, our sincere confession will give us the strength, wisdom and determination not to make that mistake again in the future.

  1. They prefer listening to talking

In a conversation humble people behave like real gentlemen and ladies. They don’t interrupt others or add corrections all the time – even if the other person happens to be wrong. Instead they listen to what others have to say, because they know it is the only way to truly understand where the other person is coming from.

Listening is an art. It requires concentration, patience, concern and an inquisitive nature. By talking about what we already know, we do not learn anything new. But by truly listening to others, we often discover new truths.

  1. When talking they don’t talk about themselves

Although I love my father very much, he isn’t a person I would single out for humility. Whenever my dad would enter into a conversation, in no time it would turn into a biopic of himself. Anything related to a place he had been or a person he knew, he would immediately seize upon to highjack the conversation. No matter how many times my sister and me would bring it to his attention, he just couldn’t help himself.

For some reason people love talking about themselves. Our ego is an attention junkie and will do almost anything to get its fix. By talking about ourselves we hope to draw admiration from others, which makes us (read: our ego) feel important, special and unique.

Humble people have transcended that childish need. They don’t need the admiration or attention of others to confirm their uniqueness. They engage in conversations not to boost their ego, but to have a meaningful exchange of ideas.

September 13 1976

  1. They’re not bloated with pride when they achieve something

Nothing is more annoying than to listen to somebody blowing his own horn. Yet human nature is such that whenever we achieve something, pride immediately enters with its loud drum to claim the victory. We feel that it was all due to our personal effort. Yet if we fail, it was never our fault.

Humble people give credit where credit is due. When they achieve something, they know that aside from their own personal effort, they also received divine help from above. Humble people will agree with the Bhagavad Gita’s wise teaching that we have the right to act, but we cannot claim the fruit of our action.

“The seed of humility is exceptionally fertile. It does not germinate plants of power and force, but it yields flowers of sweetness, grace, modesty and light.”
-Sri Chinmoy, TheJewels of Happiness

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!

Artwork by Sri Chinmoy

A story that teaches you who you truly are

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Spiritual stories have been used for centuries to share sacred teachings in a way that’s easy to understand. Many spiritual masters use stories and anecdotes to ingrain in their students the finer points of truth and wisdom.

The following story was one of the favourites of Sri Ramakrishna, a 19th century Indian spiritual master. In its simplicity and charm it reveals to us who we truly are – and also who we are not!

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Once a tigress attacked a herd of goats, when she was shot by a hunter. With her dying strength she gave birth to a little tiger cub, who was left behind with the herd of goats. The goats accepted the tiger cub as one of their own and so it grew up in the ways and habits of the goats. It ate grass, learned how to run from predators, and it even bleated like a goat.

One day a wild tiger from the jungle approached the herd. When it pounced for the attack, to its wide surprise it saw one of his own kind running away bleating like the rest of the goats. It seized the bleating tiger, who stood paralyzed with fear. The big tiger said, “Why do you bleat like a goat? Don’t act like a fool, I will show you who you really are.”

The big tiger took his younger counterpart to a nearby pond. While bending down to the water, he said, “Look! Your face looks exactly like mine. Now you can see that you are not a goat. You are a tiger.” Upon seeing the reflection of his face the tiger got the shock of his life. At the same time he felt oddly familiar in the company of the wild tiger. Already he felt something inside him was changing.

The big tiger said, “Come with me. I will teach you how to behave like the tiger you really are.” The little tiger followed him to the jungle and in due time learned to behave like his true self.

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This beautiful story teaches us that deep inside us we are much more than we think we are. We identify with our physical body, our thoughts, our work, our social status. But this is not who we truly are. In reality we are something much deeper, purer and more beautiful. As the wise masters teach us, what we truly are is the soul, the divine spark deep within us.

When we are not yet conscious of who we are, we look around us to see what others are doing, and then copy their behaviour. We behave like a goat among a herd of other goats. But when we become conscious of our soul, we realize that we are a unique creation. We connect to our higher self, and experience a constant flow of happiness and peace. Then we learn how to live in harmony with our true nature.

In the story the big tiger represents the illumined spiritual teacher or Guru. Because such a person is fully awakened to his true nature, he can inspire and help others to realize who they truly are.

There is a spiritual tiger inside you. Allow it to come to the fore and roar!

Remember,
You are not only the body,
You are not only the vital,
You are not only the mind,
You are not only the heart,
But you are also the soul,
Especially the soul.

–Sri Chinmoy

(from: Ten Thousand Flower-Flames, Part 95, Agni Press, 1983)

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA© All artwork by Sri Chinmoy

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!
How gratitude changed my bad day

How gratitude changed my bad day

Wisdom can be cheap. We tell a friend to let go of his anger after he confided in us about an unfortunate experience at work, yet the very same day we may fly into a frenzy when somebody cuts us off in traffic. It’s not that we are conscious hypocrites, but often the hustle and bustle of the practical world tends to cloud our nobler intentions. So we swear at the rogue driver, ignoring the subtler voice from our higher nature, echoing the very same advice we earlier gave to our friend.

But sometimes the worlds of practical and theoretical reality meet, and we do follow the call from our wiser self. Such moments may seem insignificant when they happen, but in hindsight they always make for significant memories…

The Mobile Restaurant

One Saturday morning a few weeks ago I found myself biking frantically through the Forest of Amsterdam, where our Sri Chinmoy Marathon Team organizes an annual six hour ultramarathon. It was about an hour to the start and I just found out that a local entrepreneur had been given a permit by the city council to serve food and drinks through his mobile restaurant to the visitors of the forest on this beautiful autumn day.

The problem was that the spot allocated to him happened to be right on our race course. In one hour forty runners would lap that spot every mile for the next six hours straight, undoubtedly bumping into his guests and stumbling over the chairs he had already stacked in front of his caravan to serve as a small terrace…

Grime and Grease

It had not been the only obstacle that morning. It had started with the discovery that we had forgotten to pack the canvas roofs of our counting tents. If it would start to rain our scoring sheets for counting the runners’ laps would be drenched and useless. Nobody had a clue where the tent roofs could be and if they still existed at all. ‘Perhaps we accidentally threw them out at the last race,’ someone suggested to everyone’s horror.

Our missing tents....

Our missing tents….

A half hour or so later I found myself staring at a closed iron gate, behind which the tables and benches for our counters and food helpers were stacked. The cricket club’s caretaker had assured me he would leave the gate open, but a firm pull at the gate’s lever told a different story.

‘What’s going on?’ I implored the heavens. No reply. Then when I thought things couldn’t possibly get any worse I ran into the entrepreneur of the mobile restaurant. Although he understood the problem of his establishment blocking our race course, he was loath to move since the permit was for this specific spot. He told me to talk to the lady who supervised the whole thing, gave me her number and said she was to be found at the entrance of the forest. I hurriedly turned my bike and raced back, currents of anxiety running through my veins.

Then my bike chain broke.

Normally it’s not a big deal since I can fling it back on in seconds. But today, as I had already figured out, wasn’t normal. The chain had come loose at both ends of the bike and refused to be put back. Grime and grease caked my hands.

A streak of sunlight

To make matters worse, we needed this bike for patrolling the race course as well. I was ready to let out a beastly roar, when all of a sudden I remembered one of my teacher Sri Chinmoy’s spiritual aphorisms:

“My gratitude-heart,
Believe it or not,
Has the capacity
To turn all my calamities
Into divine blessings.” ((by Sri Chinmoy, From the book Twenty-Seven Thousand Aspiration-Plants, Part 241, made available to share under a Creative Commons license))

It was as if a streak of sunlight suddenly pierced the clouds. I restrained myself and with an effort of sheer will starting offering gratitude to God. I tried to convince myself He knew what He was doing. ‘Thank you Lord,’ I prayed, ‘for these seemingly unfortunate experiences. I’m sure it’ll all be all right in the end.’

In a sudden moment of clarity I realized I still had the lady’s phone number. I called her and explained the situation as calmly as I could, suggesting the entrepreneur could perhaps move his business to the other side of the road, even though the permit was for this side of the road and he could get in trouble for it. ‘No problem, he can move,’ she said to my utter relief. ‘It’s the responsibility of the council that gave out the permit. They should have known you had a race,’ she added. The entrepreneur seemed just as relieved as I was when I came running with the good news and shook my hand, smiling broadly. Problem one solved!

More blessings

When I got back at the race site setup I saw problem two was solved as well, as the boys were just putting the canvas roofs on the tents. One of them had suddenly remembered where he left them back at the office. Although the office was in another town, our helpers from The Hague had swung by with their car to collect them on their way to Amsterdam.

The tents...all nicely set up! (you can see the bike too!)

The tents…all nicely set up! (you can see the bike too!)

Within minutes I had seen two calamities change into blessings. I was then reminded of my friend Vapushtara’s great technical skills and asked him if he could fix my broken bike. In ten minutes time the bike was good as new, saving me a 15 euro bike repair bill. The last problem of the closed iron gate actually proved the easiest. It turned out we could circumvent the gate by entering the cricket club through the neighboring tennis club gates. This priceless piece of information I received when I got through to the caretaker’s mobile phone on the first try.

And we then went on to have an awesome race. I never cease to be amazed by the power of gratitude…

 

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!
The Buddha’s words on happiness

The Buddha’s words on happiness

 

 

Prince Siddhartha left behind his family and his wealth in order to find the truth. After meditating for many years he reached Enlightenment and became the Buddha, the Awakened One. His wisdom speaks to us through the ages. Following are some quotes on happiness from someone who truly knows what he is talking about.

 

From the Dhammapada:

“If with a pure mind a person speaks or acts happiness follows him like his never-departing shadow.”

“Should a person do good, let him do it again and again. Let him find pleasure therein, for blissful is the accumulation of good.”

“Happy indeed we live, we who possess nothing. Feeders on joy we shall be, like the radiant Gods.”

“Victory begets enmity; the defeated dwell in pain. Happily the peaceful live, discarding both victory and defeat.”

“Hatred is never appeased by hatred in this world. By non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is a law eternal.”

“Health is the most precious gain and contentment the greatest wealth.”

“Good is it to see the Noble Ones; to live with them is ever blissful. One will always be happy by not encountering fools.”

“Association with fools is ever painful, like partnership with an enemy. But association with the wise is happy, like meeting one’s own kinsmen.”

“Follow the Noble One, who is steadfast, wise, learned, dutiful and devout. One should follow only such a man, who is truly good and discerning, even as the moon follows the path of the stars.”

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A selection from the Mahamangala Sutra or ‘The Discourse on Blessings’:

“To be generous in giving, to be righteous in conduct, to help one’s relatives, and to be blameless in action — this is the greatest blessing.

To loathe evil and abstain from it, to refrain from intoxicants, and to be steadfast in virtue — this is the greatest blessing.

To be respectful, humble, contented and grateful; and to listen to the Dhamma [teachings of the Buddha] on due occasions — this is the greatest blessing.

A mind unruffled by the vagaries of fortune, from sorrow freed, from defilements cleansed, from fear liberated — this is the greatest blessing.

Those who thus abide, ever remain invincible, in happiness established.”

 

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!
Soothing Music to Calm Your Frayed Nerves

Soothing Music to Calm Your Frayed Nerves

If (like me) you spend many hours on a computer, having some music in the background can really make the difference in what kind of day you have. Here are four pieces of music that are perfect for listening to during or after work to relieve tension and help you relax:

Sri Chinmoy

As this site is inspired by The Jewels of Happiness book, it is worth mentioning that the author Sri Chinmoy was also a noted performer of meditative music who gave many concerts for peace at venues all around the world. At the start of these concerts, Sri Chinmoy would enter, humbly bow to the audience, and then meditate, enabling thousands of people to participate in shared moments of peace and silence. Then Sri Chinmoy would play his own compositions on a variety of different instruments, including flute. This flute performance is from a 1984 concert in Melbourne, Australia.

Agnikana’s Group

Many of Sri Chinmoy’s meditation students have also been inspired to perform his music at concerts around the world. Agnikana’s Group is one such group, most of whose members come from the small town of Zlin in the Czech Republic. When you listen to them play, you feel a sense of sitting serenely beside a stream, which washes away everything that is bothering you. This music is really a balm to the nerves.

Alap

Alap is a very highly regarded musician from Switzerland who creates compositions that have aptly been described as “musical landscapes.” The sound is very expansive, and when you listen to it you feel that all your worries are dissolving in a wide ocean of music. In some compositions he uses electronic instruments; in others he plays a wide variety of flutes, many of which he has made himself.

Boris Purushottama Grebenshikov

Boris is a household name in his native Russia, where he is endearingly referred to as its “poet laureate.” He has been singing and performing since the seventies, when he and his group Aquarium gained widespread popularity through underground channels despite being blacklisted by the Soviet authorities. His music and lyrics, which have a philosophical, enquiring nature, have drawn comparisons to Bob Dylan’s songs. You can hear this Russian singer’s dulcet tones as he narrates a chapter on the audiobook of The Jewels of Happiness. The following track is from his 2007 concert at the United Nations in New York.

For a life-changing experience, read Sri Chinmoy’s book The Jewels of Happiness. Timeless truths, easy-to-follow meditation exercises and sound spiritual advice from a truly enlightened author. Check it out now!
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